There are currently 5 planets in retrograde:
Galactic Gazette - Retrograde Rundown
Hey there, space cadets! Marty here, your cosmic courier in this existential trip. So, you got your crystals charged and your tie-dye t-shirts fresh out of the dryer? Good! Because we're about to hit some serious astrological turbulence. 88 miles per hour of planetary retrograde. Hold on to your hoverboards!
First off, Mercury is hanging out in Virgo, which is like trying to fit an encyclopedia into a matchbox. Expect your communication to be as precise as a laser beam but as hard to control as a DeLorean on a patch of black ice. Don't panic – just remember, it's your density—I mean, destiny.
Venus, that love bug, is doing her diva thing in dramatic Leo. Hearts are a-fluttering and drama is rising faster than my blood pressure when Biff is around. Keep a cool head, folks! Love might make you feel like you're time-traveling, but trust me, there's no such thing as 'the past' in relationships...or is there?
Meanwhile, Mars is lounging in Libra, trying to decide whether he wants to start a war or a book club. Stay balanced, my friends. And remember, conflict can be as constructive as building a flux capacitor if handled right.
As for Jupiter in Taurus, that's like having your eccentric uncle win the lottery. He's generous, but with a side of stubbornness. Embrace the abundance, but don't get stuck in your ways.
Saturn in Pisces? Think discipline meets daydream. It's like trying to maintain a strict schedule at a Woodstock festival. Good luck with that!
And Uranus in Taurus is about as comfortable as a Vegan at a steakhouse. Expect some seismic shifts in your value systems.
Neptune in Pisces is home turf for our dreamy friend – it's like Doc Brown in a science lab. Dive deep into your subconscious, just watch out for the enchanting sirens of illusion.
Last, but certainly not least, Pluto in Capricorn is like a corporate takeover on a soul-level. Power plays and transformations are in store, so hang tight to your principles.
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