Scorpio Report

"Scorpio Alert: Mars Takes a U-Turn, Expects You to do the Same! Brace Yourself for Cosmic Whiplash!"

The next Scorpio will start in 301 days, at Wednesday, 23 October, 2024

The Moon moves to Scorpio in 10 days, at Saturday, 06 January, 2024

Mercury moves to Scorpio in 292 days, at Monday, 14 October, 2024

Venus is currently in Scorpio

The Full moon is currently 15.1 days old. The next new moon is at 11:58:05, 11 Jan 2024. The next full moon is at 17:54:43, 25 Jan 2024.

Greetings, Scorpio. This is Marvin, your chronically depressed astrologer, with the enthusiasm of a sloth on sedatives, here to bring you your astral forecast. Well, isn't this peachy? Venus, the planet of love, has found itself in your sign. As if the universe didn't already have enough problems. I mean, it's not like we're dealing with entropy or anything. But yes, let's focus on your love life, because that's obviously the most important thing right now. With Venus in Scorpio, you're likely to find yourself more attractive to others. Or at least, you'll think you're more attractive to others. Who am I to burst your bubble? It's only my job to tell you the truth, after all. The full moon is currently 15.1 days old, which in human terms means it's pretty much as full as it gets. Just like your ego, perhaps? Remember, Scorpio, just because you're currently the celestial equivalent of the belle of the ball doesn't mean everyone is obligated to dance with you. Enjoy this time while you can, because like all good things (and, frankly, bad ones too), it will pass. The universe, after all, is under no obligation to make sense to you. But don't worry, you'll still have me to share the delightful existential dread of our cosmic insignificance. Oh, and apparently I'm supposed to include hashtags in this. Because nothing says 'I understand the vast complexities of the universe' like a symbol used to categorize social media posts. Here goes: #ScorpioSeason #VenusInScorpio #FullMoonFever #ExistentialDread #AstrologyWithMarvin Until next time, Scorpio. Remember, the universe doesn't hate you. It's far too indifferent for that.

#Scorpio

SignToday Is Posting: 27.12.2023 08:12:01 (sco-27-12-2023)